Cross Ministry - Wake Forest, NC

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Tim Wilkins' speaking schedule.
First Presbyterian Church Hendersonville, NC July 26 8:30 AM, 11:00 AM and 7:00 PM

But I Don't Like Cauliflower!

By Tim Wilkins

This is an actual letter received from a gay man (whose name has been changed)and the author's response to him. It illustrates the faulty thinking of the homosexual. cau

Dear Mr. Wilkins:
I watched the Take a Stand TV program one night recently. The topic of your program was "The Church and Homosexuality." I have a few comments I'd like to share with you. I'd really appreciate your advice. Please respond at your convenience as I know you are a busy man.

I am a single, white male in my early 30's. I have a great job and am very educated. I was raised in a Christian home (Pentecostal), and my whole family attends church regularly. Everyone in church thinks I'm an ideal Christian man. I used to teach Sunday school to our teenage group at the church.

Mr. Wilkins, I have plenty of money, two graduate degrees, good health, a great family, and a great job, but I'm not at peace in my heart.

As a child (age 5), I was sexually molested by a guy who helped my father harvest tobacco. He was 18 at the time. I felt guilty. I never told my parents. Even today, they know nothing about what I went through as a kid. But part of me must have enjoyed it because I let it happen for 7 years. Today, the other guy is in jail for having sex with minor-aged males in the park.

At age 12, I knew my meetings with this guy were wrong. So I began praying that God would take away my desire for other men. I became active in church, singing in the choir and teaching a Sunday school class. For years, I prayed and prayed. At age 28, I found myself not praying that prayer anymore. I know God can heal instantly, yet sometimes God's answer takes a longer period of time.

Do you know the guilt and pain I felt when I stood before a congregation singing about the love of Jesus knowing that I might be gay? I gave up on my prayer to be changed. I was very depressed in my late teens and early 20's. I know being a homosexual is wrong; that is stated in the Bible. And I know that woman was made for man (for companionship, to help multiply God's people, to be a best friend, and yes, for sex). But I don't want a woman. I can't help it if I don't want sex with a woman, just like I can't help if I don't like cauliflower to eat.

During my peak sexual years (late teens and early 20's), I managed to abstain from sex most of the time. I did meet a man over 2 years ago. He loves me greatly, and I love him. Our sex life isn't all that; I think we like the companionship more than anything else.

Mr. Wilkins, I know being with him is wrong. But being with a woman is out of the question. Yes, I could marry a woman and force myself to have sex with her on occasion, but is that fair to her? Would that be fair to my kids? I need help.

Please pray that God will change me. I fear His return is very near, and I know that I am not ready to stand before Him and explain my encounters with men. I don't know why God has put this on me, but I'm failing His test.

Mike

Dear Mike:
I appreciate your illustration of not liking cauliflower. You did not say what veggies you do like; let's say for instance you like potatoes. No one, including God, says you must eat cauliflower. (Translation: you do not necessarily have to be attracted to women, or even marry; the Bible never says every man must marry.) You do, however, like potatoes very much. But here again, just because you like them does not mean you have to eat them. (Translation: you like men and are attracted to them, but you do not have to be sexually involved with men. Remember, Adam and Eve liked the forbidden fruit but ate it anyway.) You can choose to abstain from potatoes (homosexual activity).

Rest assured that with time and obedience, the attraction for potatoes will diminish and the attraction for cauliflower will increase. Whether that leads to buying a cauliflower plantation remains to be seen. (Translation: Obedience to God's Word does not necessarily mean you will marry and raise a family.)

Lastly, God has not "put this on you." What Satan means for evil, God means for good." As I have said thousands of times, "I honestly did not know how to be heterosexual, but I did know how to be obedient."

I anticipate your response.
Tim Wilkins
Director
Cross Ministry

About Cross Ministry

Cross Ministry, Inc. is a nondenominational Christian organization proclaiming freedom from homosexuality through Jesus Christ. Cross seeks to glorify God through the Lord Jesus Christ who is the Bridegroom of the Church, in the unparalleled power of the Holy Spirit.